Put On Ice
by Prime627
Summary: Post Overloaded part two. The Autobots need to get back to their portion of the world, but they are weighed down with the weather and Polar Claw who needs to be knocked out every so often. (I'm turning this into another dump about some humorous scenarios. Rating will jump upon an M-rated request XD But not before)
1. Chapter 1

Whales in the distance exhaled mist into the air, tiny flukes raising and dipping beneath the water as year-old calves swam next to their mothers. Polar bears watched them, a mother with two cubs tearing into a seal lifting her head and standing on her forelegs to see the whales before the sea swallowed them up again. Optimus put the last snow-covered rock in front of the entrance of the cave and the temperature steady began increasing with Windblade firing her engines to melt stubborn ice on her wings and core and Sideswipe and Drift's attempts at fire. The two mechs were bent over the brush that the minicons had pulled from the ground after stumbling upon tundra and caribou. Mostly smoke filled the cave, but it was a sign of fire to come.

Optimus settled in the snow, shivering still. He swept his servo over the snow, discovering rock and ice beneath it. He began sweeping the snow towards the entrance, packing it between the cracks in the ice and rocks he had salvaged. Polar Claw stirred, but his optics remained closed. For now.

Drift sat back when his hard work and patience paid off. The minicons tended to the fire, keeping it small by breaking off pieces of the brush and dropping them onto the hungry flame.

Sideswipe used the heat source to rub warmth back into his leg. He scooted as close to the fire as he could to nurse his leg. It bothered him, and according to him, the Energon still coursing through his veins felt like fire.

Meanwhile, Optimus felt like his old self.

Jetstorm started shivering badly and Drift swept him closer. Optimus watched the minicons, his optics narrowing. The minicons would need constant tending to due to their smaller size. They would get colder faster, but would need less time in front of the fire. Optimus tilted his helm. "How about a story?"

Windblade flicked melting ice off her wings. "How about you tell us where you learned to just take one characteristic from an alt mode?"

All optics fell on him and he smiled a little. "Amalgamous helped me with that one," he confessed...

 _Optimus was practicing hard on his own when Amalgamous crept out of the shadows, like he seemingly always did. He rested a servo on Optimus' shoulder, making the other Prime start._

 _"It's only me."_

 _Optimus looked at the mech, who sported a different paint job. Just this morning, he knew, he had seen the mech grey with red highlights down his arms, around his legs, and under his optics. Now he was black and flecks of grey where they were once red. "How do you do that?"_

 _"You can do it, too," he said. "All Amalgami can take a physical form, but everyone can take just one aspect of an alt mode and use it. Observe." His optics grew brighter as he scanned Optimus and Amalgamous shrunk to his height. "I can take height," he said as he scanned the other Prime's shoulders. His changed as well. "I can take your shoulders, and finally..." He closed his optics and exhaled, his paint fluttering and brightening to mirror Optimus' own accents. If Optimus had an exact twin, Optimus figured he would look how Amalgamous looked now. "I can take your accents." He laughed and shook off, the paint falling back to its previous colors and his shoulders shrunk the same time he grew._

 _"How can I do that?"_

 _"It's a long lecture and takes years of practice, but I'll show you how to take another's color, okay? Then we'll talk about the rest in turn. Sounds good?"_

 _"Excellent."_

Optimus smiled as he finished the story, remembering how, after Optimus had taken the colors of the shifting mists in the Realm, both he and Amalgamous surprised their oldest brother, Prima, making the Prime chase them while screaming curses and throwing objects he randomly came across. Amalgamous had never had more fun. Optimus thought he was going to die at the servos of Prima.

"I bet the first thing you did was prank someone," Sideswipe said.

Optimus scoffed. "I had better things to do with my new-found talent."

Windblade hugged her knees to her chest. "Did the Primes teach you anything else?"

He smiled at her and nodded, launching into another story.

 _"Sparks change," Micronus said as he absently scratched behind Onyx's audio. The large Predacon's tail wagged lightly at the stimulation there and he huffed a pleasured puff of steam. Micronus snorted and grinned at Optimus, who was seated in front of him. "Bad mechs have specks of good in them, good mechs have shadows of evil."_

 _"I knew this, Micronus," Optimus insisted._

 _"So you did," the smaller Prime sighed and he patted Onyx's snout. The Predacon pushed himself to his pedes and stretched. "But do you know how to get to the heart of a beast?"_

 _Optimus had never fought with Onyx before then, and had never wanted to. He still didn't want to, but the large beast roared and rushed him. It looked like he had forgotten that Optimus was friend and only identified the mech as a foe. Optimus discarded his weapons, believing that Onyx wouldn't hurt him._

 _Onyx turned his helm to regard the forgotten sword and axe, then snapped his jaws shut inches from Optimus' audio. Before he could draw his helm back, Optimus' servos shut up and scratched behind his audios and under his jaw. The Predacon melted to the floor, purring and snuffling as he curled tighter and tighter around the littler mech._

 _Micronus chuckled. "All sparks can change."_

 _"Even Onyx's," Optimus laughed and he rubbed the snout of his brother._

 _"Yeah. Even a stupid lug like him."_

 _Onyx exhaled a warm puff and purred as if in agreement._

Sideswipe watched him. "You're related to a Predacon?"

"Fortunately, he does not need to eat while he is dead," Optimus said in a false sigh of relief. "Or I would not be here. I heard he could eat all of the Decepticons twice over and still hunger for more when he was alive."

Windblade shuddered. "Thank Primus everyone got smaller as time went on...could you imagine? Predacons would rule the galaxy."

Drift frowned a little. The minicons had moved into his lap and he didn't feel he should move them onto the cold stone yet. "Why have we all shrunk?"

Optimus had a simple explanation.

 _Solus forged the body of a sparkling, holding the spark to it in one servo, the handle of the Forge in the other. She watched Optimus. "It took too long to make frames. I used to make seventy frames daily, and we'd still be short, so we started making them smaller and smaller. Now I make up around a hundred and we have some left over that get recycled, but this little guy is special, and I couldn't just give them a random frame. No. This one has to be crafted."_

 _Optimus saw the squirmy mechling when his sister had finished. "Amazing."_

Sideswipe moved his leg, sighing. "Doesn't hurt as much," he declared and he moved away from the fire to prop himself up against the cave wall. His optics closed. Windblade moved closer to him "to monitor him", but Optimus saw more than a kind gesture. He smirked at them, then looked at Drift, who was watching him.

"I will wake you in hour intervals," he promised. "We cannot fall asleep for long, as Polar Claw might wake up and we will have to knock him back out."

Drift held his sword and watched the Decepticon mech curled up on his side. He had watched the Prime fuss over him, complaining often that it didn't look like he was comfortable, but when he was all curled up with his helm on his servos, Drift realized he did indeed look comfortable. "Very well. I will take the first watch."

"I'm afraid that the first watch is already taken."

"Are you sure that you are okay?"

Optimus nodded. "Rest now, Drift."

The mech was only reluctant for a moment.

 **Tada. So, maybe I should just turn this into a running thing about adventures the Bots have in the artic XD Have fun with this. This is post Overloaded part two. Enjoy~**


	2. Chapter 2

They were on the move again, climbing onto floes of ice and clinging to them when Optimus' greater weight threatened a capsize. Sideswipe and Drift used their swords like the tusks of the watching walruses, shoving the blades through the ice and using them to move across the slick surface. Windblade clung to Sideswipe like a regular tick. Optimus couldn't help but remember his own tick...

 _"I'm cold," she had gasped and Optimus had tucked her closer to his side, protecting her from the invading storm._

At least this day was warmer.

"Hey, Prime." Sideswipe stabbed another ice floe and drug it closer. "Got anymore stories for us while you were in the Realm?"

Optimus stepped across the floes, making it threaten to capsize. Drift growled and stabbed the ice with his own sword, hissing a threat at the ice in Cybertronian. Optimus chuckled lightly.

"As a matter of fact..."

 _"Pick one, Prime." Micronus watched the Prime look between the two prizes._

 _Arcee was tied up and dangled over a tank of acid that bubbled and hissed as her pedes touched the acid. She gave a scream of pain and struggled, her optics wide and pleading at Optimus._

 _On the other side of the Realm, there was a human child no older than Raf floating on a mattress in the middle of a pool of sharks that circled it and crept closer in on it, interest sparking off them like electricity. The infant wailed._

 _He wasn't fast enough to save both. He would never be fast enough to save both. But one was fast enough to save the other._

 _Micronus watched as Optimus took his alt form and drove at Arcee directly. He cut her down and set her onto the ground. He pointed at the pool and she tore off in her own alt mode. She covered more distance than anyone, and before Optimus could even cycle an intake, the infant was safe and the shark that had tried to take a bite out of Arcee's leg was sorry._

 _Arcee walked back to her Prime, cradling the infant. "She is safe," she informed him and she set the baby in Optimus' servos. He rubbed the little head with a digit before both it and Arcee faded._

 _Micronus watched him with narrowed optics. "The right answer was to save the infant."_

 _"I could save both, and I will continue to save both."_

 _"Even at the cost of making a mistake? Even at the cost of someone's life?"_

 _Optimus regarded him silently for a moment. "It was either neither or both. Saving one would have left me with guilt and regret. I completed your task."_

 _"You completed it wrongly," Micronus snapped and he stormed away. "You will never leave this Realm!"_

Sideswipe huffed as he drug a large floe towards him. Windblade whimpered and he immediately adjusted himself to best suit her. Optimus chuckled. "Sounds like Micronus thought you were stupid."

"Or stubborn," the Prime laughed. He shifted Polar Claw's weight, stepping onto the floe. It made no threats and Drift gave a grunt of success as if his cursing finally made it through. He shook out his aching arms, sighing lightly.

"Prime. Our current course of action is...slow, painful, and exhausting."

"Perhaps a short break is in order," Optimus said and he set Polar Claw down on the edge of the floe to begin the process of evening out the weight, but the shouts of the others came too late.

The floe capsized and dumped its cargo into the water.

Optimus laid on his back on the bottom of the ocean, chuckling lightly. "Well. Now we cannot worry about exhausting our energy on floes."  
Groans filled the ocean.

 **This chapter is for Lily002. Enjoy, darling~**


	3. Chapter 3

Polar Claw swam confidently through the cold water, every so often huffing mist when his snout went underwater. Beside him, Optimus paddled less confidently, his optics wide and scared. This swimming thing was not as cool as he thought it would be. Meanwhile, Sideswipe was not showing wear, even with Windblade still clinging to him like a burr. Drift was keeping his minicons out of the water, mostly. Every so often a wave from Polar Claw made them squeak in fear.

The Decepticon hauled himself onto an ice floe, resting his helm on it to take a break while his back legs treaded water. Optimus and the other Autobots did the same. Jetstorm and Slipstream huddled onto the floe like penguins. Optimus looked at Polar Claw, who exvented mist.

"How much further, Polar Claw?"

The Decepticon watched him wearily before he pointed with a claw to a distant shore. "Close," he growled. He stiffened when a black fin broke the surface.

Optimus watched as one fin cut a little too close for comfort and he gave a shout when the smooth-skinned mammal nuzzled up to him. He relaxed as it gave light nips to his leg and he rubbed its head.

"Travel in pods," Polar Claw grumbled. He released the floe, rocking everyone else. Drift gave a shudder, his optics dim and closing slowly. "Calf travels beside mother." He waved his claws at the calf, but it whistled and hid behind Optimus, nuzzling the back of his knees.

Optimus dove under the water to touch the calf's nose. It regarded him with a tiny black eye set in front of a large white oval. He smiled, finding he liked this little calf. The pod was slowly surrounding a leopard seal that bathed in the sun, the blood of an unfortunate baby on its snout. It burped contentedly and rolled over, closer to the orcas. Optimus looked away when the shrieks started.

The baby rubbed up against him, swimming around and around him, beating him lightly with flukes and fins before the Prime started to swim after it. Polar Claw led the Autobots after him.

The pod started up again, and allowed the Autobots to grab at their dorsal fins. They stayed closer to the surface, the cows. The bulls were unimpressed by the Cybertronain visitors. However, Optimus' calf stayed beside him.

"It is an orphan," Polar Claw growled. "It joined this pod. Different accent in whistle and clicks. Doesn't belong."

Optimus shifted his grip on the cow he was clinging to. She exhaled mist and whistled as Optimus stroked the head of the calf beside him. "Hello, misfit."

It squealed and swam faster. The cow bellowed and it circled back, almost like a punished sparkling would. It stayed close to the cow.

"She has claimed it as her own," Drift observed. He was trembling, laying out on the back of an old cow that the calves liked to swim around.

Polar Claw swam beside Optimus, huffing and snorting mist. The calf nuzzled under him several times, and Optimus always feared that the little calf would get stuck with Polar Claw's claws, but it never was and his fear slowly got less and less as he watched.

They left the pod when the shore came into view. Optimus slipped off the cow first, and then the others reluctantly splashed down. Polar Claw shook off on solid ground and turned his helm to see the calf still following, its cries insistent and begging, provoking Optimus to walk back into the water and hold the calf. The pod stopped, but Optimus was too far away to tell why. The calf, meanwhile, was nuzzling up to him and chirping.

"I have to go," he whispered and he rubbed its smooth skin. The calf burbled gently and moved closer. "I will see you around, okay?" He gave a squeal that sparklings knew as _I'll be back._

The calf turned away and bolted from him, surprising and saddenning the Prime. Did he offend it? But no, it came back with a rock grasped gently in its teeth. He took it and rubbed its nose. Then it swam right for the pod, which gathered back up again and continued. Optimus waded back onto dry land and he subspaced the rock.

"Made a friend today?" Drift laid out in the dying sun, trembling under the cold rocks. Snow fell down around them, and Polar Claw was tearing up the earth to dig a cave big enough before the storm started. He was muttering about it as he worked. The minicons joined in frantically, but they were shovelled back with the scoops of snow.

"It appears so." He looked at Polar Claw. "Do you have any friends?" Perhaps Polar Claw isn't the only polar Decepticon romping around.

"Had mate, maybe cubs. Have not seen any cubs for long time." He grunted, shovelling Slipstream back with the last pawful of snow before he leaned back and looked over at Optimus. "Miss them sometimes."

Optimus remembered that male polar bears didn't care for the cubs they sired. They created with a female, then left, and the females gave birth to one or two cubs in her long sleep, waking up to bundles of white pressing against her. They grew fast, he recalled, and some twin brothers stayed with each other longer than normal after leaving their mother before finally separating.

"I know the feeling," Optimus chuckled softly, shaking his helm. He got up and helped Polar Claw with the cave. The Decepticon huffed a little bit. "I have my own boys."

Polar Claw went back to digging, hurrying his efforts when he struck dirt and he shovelled it into the minicons faces when they tried to get a closer look. Optimus spared them, chuckling. "Orion and Paxus, in honor of my former self."

"Clever," the Decepticon growled. He disappeared into the cave he was crafting, making it wider. Optimus knew it promised warmth, and it touched him how the Decepticon was making it wider, as if he had accepted the Autobots into his little pack of one.

"Paxus is a bookworm, as I had been," Optimus continued. He smiled at the memories of his boys. "And Orion wants nothing to do with history or reading."

"Very, very interesting," Polar Claw said. He laid down on the dirt and huffed. "Are you coming in?"

After all the Autobots crawled in and curled up with each other, Optimus made more room by pulling Polar Claw into his lap instead of leaving him in exile. The Decepticon struggled only minutely before Optimus' digits scratched behind his audio. Polar Claw laid his helm down on Optimus' thigh and he closed his optics.

"You are not going to knock me out?"

"No," Optimus smiled. "I trust you."


End file.
